Everyone, everything.. is against you..

I feel shit.. I started to explain that I am post-op transgender woman.. I used woman who have got transgendered background.. I was dreaming living in Lapland or Nordland, Norway.. I get rejected by woman.. she looking for man but she was not added specific details for which kind person her try to find.. I just read Osho the Empty Boat and I realized that I looking for that people accepted me.. this is coward way, asking permission to be true.. I am sensitive person.. I just started to think I should be who I am. I found that she mirrored myself that I asking permission to be who I am.. she sensed that because she said something like I need be me, and be brave.. something like that.. I am more aware about that. I can read people, I understand in subconscious level things too.. I sensed that I was unsecure that and she said I need power to be me…

I procrastinated again with that Tai Lopez affiliating thing.. being partner. I don’t know.. I telling him everybody. I am scared that I lost my retirement payment.. I was really depressed and I have diagnosis of depression which not will go away.. I am very sensitive also and I suffer social anxiety too.. both are uncurable.. there’s really bad fight if I will try to rise..

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