I reading Charles Bukowski books and I get him in my head, he is like my God. I suck him in my mind. I get bottle of Jameson, and I get some. It really liberated me to everything. I was somewhere else and my anxiety was gone. I don’t like word where we live at now and everything started to feel so painful, and good ol’ friend alcohol come to my life. I have mild hungover. Jameson did very good to me. It’s one of my favourite whiskey, Chivas Regal is my favourite, both 12 years old and 18 years old, an 18 old Chivas Regal is very expensive.. I think Jameson is like this my younghood idol Jenna Jameson.. I watched Pornmagazines and I saw Jenna Jameson, also I felt love with Lady Domina.. I found her when I went out closed being a woman, she made me her slave.. I found all pornstars near me, she was stripper, and also university student, so she was intelligent, sexy, beautiful and she was my Lady Domina on my dreams come true. It really manifested by woman like her. I was quite shocked when I found that my Pornmagazines started to live and my sexual fantasies come to reality. My career in academic world stopped, I was nearly chemist, nature science. I did fantazing being a professor or like that, and I found I am becoming a chemist. And I felt love with that beautiful young woman, The Lady Domina. .. It was very nice thing in my life that what we had. My ex-wife was suitable version of The Lady Domina.. My ex-wife made me study how to eat pussy. It took 5,5 years a row. .. She made me a sober. Maybe I became a dull, a dry as a bone or something. Then I have got Lolita, 17 years old girl, she was almost 18 years old. I read that book called Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, and it fixed my mind to seek younger women, and I found her. She was quite bad on her personality, and also I found narcissistic personality traits, she also did test of psychopathology, and showed her results. I don’t know what to say. Maybe she teased me to show those results, I don’t know. She started to shown very dangerous traits so I decided to run. Also that narcism started to poisoning me. .. Maybe next one became suitable from. She could be very young, but don’t get me wrong, I don’t like too young, but consept being with younger woman, girly girl, and I would love to be like father or something for her and lick her pussy. And giving her advice on life, support her everyday life.. I was auntie for my ex girlfriend.. And there was British Young Lady who put this daddy thing in my mind.
I have a bottle of good whiskey, I become Charles Bukowski. I feel so. It feels dangerous too. So much similarities between us. .. Daddy lesson, think, believe, dream and you will become. I dreaming become writer, poet, also being billionaire, because you should start to understand how to make money. I learned by billionaires how to make it. But I do at now very little and I am quite poor.