She is gone now..

I get excited and asked her out and that girl just disappeared at dating site.. I am sad.. and disappointed.. I felt yesterday that I am totally helpless and I felt also how powerful strength of poverty is. It’s literally kills you. You see your clothes, your computers, your tools are all are outdated.. you are totally shit. Your teeth, your body.. your nutrition.. everything is threaded.. you feel that the poverty will kill you.. I am very sad, I feel scared.. I know how I can connect everything my systems.. it’s also a risk that I will getting worse.. destroy that what I already have.. I have freedom but yeah, I don’t have money to make me happy, to do things what I love.. I feel that I coming to rotten inside and start to die.. it’s scary feel, feel so.. I know how to fill that ben-form which helps to start affiliate with Tai Lopez.. but I need to succeed immediately.. you know.. if I am not I am in deep trouble..

But yeah, I read Sam Walton’s book Made in America. It’s literally just what I do with women.. doing cunnilingus.. thinking what she thinks.. getting know everything about her pussy, her body, her desires.. asking first stupid questions to getting know better what she loves and what she’s not.. and serve the best.. become to knowing everything what she knows her body, her pussy and know little bit better.. but she’s always right, she is my customer.. she is the Queen. Princess. I am here to serve her, submitting her wishes.. being her slave, her servant.. serve her the best treat, she deserved only the best.. she is always right. Always, period. Always.

That is my key to become very good with sex.. I am not say that I know everything, I love sex and there was time when I studied the all. My learning curve is now saturated, there’s difficult to find something new.. but I merely made mistake to think I know everything, it is impossible..

I think I made my mistake.. I chase her.. I want her.. just like I saw that cat. I approached her and she saw me and run a way.. she was so scared.. like hairy ball which runs to the tree. I remember that she stared at me when she stopped and turned to look at me. She was so scared. I chased her and she climbed the tree. I thought I did so, when that girl is now gone.. I chased her. I need to understand what Tai Lopez said that happiness is like a cat.. your need made environment that which is best possible for cat.. and then cat realize that there is no danger.. she can trust me.. and it is not what I want, it is what she wants.. it’s all about her, not me. Okey, but a human is selfish.. thinking her best interest.. I have suggestions of reading evolution biology too.. like Darwin.. the selfish gene by Richard Dawkins.. and there is text book of that also for evolution biology.. it’s a human thing, it’s not money thing. Tai Lopez said also money is like a cat too.. if you chase it, it will run a way.. just like girls.. I hope she will returns.. I was very good for her.. but I was also cat chaser and she is gone…

Persuading

I am seemingly very good with that.. I am 37 woman, I spoked with 21 girl.. she said that she was not interested me cos she looking for 19-24.. I just sold myself to her. What a fuck.. it was on dating site. I found she was just what I looking for. 21, and her inner beauty, wit.. her dating profile was just like did for me. And I was right, we have chemistry between.. okay, I hope that she feel more than being sold for me.. I really persuaded like pro.. but I really thought that she is the one. 37 old is like a pigment of skin.. innermost is the thing.. I get sad that she said first I am too old, I cracked it somehow.. I just wanted her.. if I can do that I can do anything.. I was more persuader, seller than ever.. it is in me.. I am changed, totally.. wtf.. I told why I am better than younger women.. something happened.. yep, ‘why’… Because.. I know what I want.. I can guarantee that I don’t need to run looking for woman.. I am sporty, body is like a 20 years old.. but I know I am older but.. wtf.. I just turned everything upside down.. but we had chemistry between, we chatted 6 hours row.. it was the flow…

I found my why

People need the why, and I think my why is helping people out of 9-5 misery. I give Tai Lopez name for every one to help people.. I said in dating site that my goal of my life is sharing money making tips for younger women and I gave name of Tai Lopez.. also Poor Charlie’s Almanack by Charlie Munger, book. I getting insane.. I know I should not try to fuck with higher power.. I should be retired, and poor.. I say fuck with everybody, I will burry those cockroaches! Lol.. Scarface quote.. Sosa comes very angry and comes to kill you. Tony Montana said, say hello to my little friend! You wanna fuck with me, you will fuck with the best.. you wanna play with me, you need fuckin army.. shoot me, I will take those fuckin bullets.. go ahead, shoot.. push it to the limit..

I am gone now.. literally I am a shit.. just like what 21 old girl said my at dating site, “yuck hell! You are the dirty shit!”. Something like dirty old shit who wanna hard younger women and who is very nasty, bastard.. who wanna eat younger women pussy but her life is kind over in mentally.. or time to face the reality.. but fuck the age.. I am dirty shit, or dirty old shit who are pervert minded.. she not say that, I am old.. my Lolita said.. we have our games.. sex-games, roleplays.. old ugly woman who chasing younger woman.. something like that.. she get super aroused, and wet for that… My brain got rewired.. sweet seventeen.. we have birthday party when she get an adult.. she was young, I know.. but not too young.. here Finland is safe-age is sixteen.. she was almost eighteen, an adult. She was my Lolita, my Baby Girl. Kind a vision too.. i miss her, but she was slightly narcissistic, also she loved to dominate me also. I feel also that I am a live.. I experienced the flow.. I experienced recently when I decided to take action to go through my fears and start play games with Tai Lopez.. I need put Scarface Push It to the Limit in my headphones and go through my fears, hell.. just like Winston Churchill said, if you’re in hell, keep going..

“Hit the wheel and double the stakes
Throttle wide open like a bat out of hell
You crash the gates (Crash the gates)
Going for the back of beyond
Nothing gonna stop you, there’s nothing that strong”

My Dad gives me to watch Scarface when I was a kid.. so powerful that quote.. Push It to the Limit… I need fight, and die with trying.. I asked also recently my idol, Finnish former pornstar out.. she not reply me.. I play now with high stakes.. I am the high roller.. all-in babe..

You are correct

Listen yourself and those who understand money, not anyone else. That is something what Tai Lopez told me, mute people who not understand money. Also I read beautiful quote from Poor Charlie Almanack, I don’t remember who said this but, your right because your calculations etc is correct. I listened my mother and I went bias. She was excellent option to that I need to purchase those book, but I have very limited amount money. It’s breaks little bit my defense. My Babylon, you should read The Richest Man in Babylon, I love idea how that book describes money. Yeah those money which now in those books was like soldiers, they attacked. I need of course learn more, and those books are gems too and maybe elevate my game. As you see, I getting confinent because I have knowledge in my head. But I don’t know how to run business, never did. There’s also the book which describes as pics how business works. Lol, I get suggestions of Ukko for Google when I typing that text, it’s an accounting firm. My friend said that I need to collect bottles, berries.. I think that is putting down.. it’s sad because I trusted him. And when my therapy get over, I understand he manipulated me. … Well I am lonely too at now. I gave my phone number to the Rose-Pussy.. she thought that if she gave my her pussy, I get mad because she is polyamorous and don’t like committed by just one person. I am not sure what I am.. I am maybe both.. I thought that is more that I am old fart.. when I was young there is the church which influenced by folks, me too, monogamous relationship is highly marketed by the church. Also a film industry. Social proof bias and authority bias.. the 25 gognitive bias by Charlie Munger.. it’s a norm to be monogamous.. monkey see, monkey do, this is how a social proof tendency, bias works.. every body get married.. but yeah being the second is not so romantic thing.. my ex-wife was woman who made me her number one, and that feels warm and I feel I was loved too.. but yeah I think I am little bit both.. I am very sexual and I am also very romantic.. but I need to chase money.. or doing my place where the cat loves to live.. and maybe one day that cat sitting my lap. Also chasing orgasm in sex is a good way to destroy your sexual experience, it’s better to think that you need consentrate having pleasure and collecting it in very big balloon which not popup.. in this kind thinking you will experience great sex.. it’s how tantra gurus having sex..

Meaning of life

I recommend you to read book called Man’s Searching for Meaning by Viktor E Frankl. He was invented the logotherapy. Take away the book is you should find your ‘why’, and then you can find the how. If you not have the why in your life everything will feel desperate and meaningless. I by quote here also Charlie Munger by his Poor Charlie’s Almanack, word why, will open many Rosetta Stones.. you will find then answers like how… Ask yourself many times why.. Also Tai Lopez said me in his videos, the 67 Steps, how important is to asking by yourself, why. Also he and Munger spoke to topic of inversion, to thinking the problem with backwards and forwards. Lopez spoke chess like thinking, the end game. There’s so much information of my head what I get Tai Lopez and now what found Munger’s book and now I also get lot of golden nuggets of Frankl’s book. Read.. that’s the key, change your brain. I also purchased Tai Lopez cashflow system, it seems very good. But it is the real deal and I need to learn how to make taxing systems to work. It’s seems difficult for me at now. I am fucked up and I need to respect also season. I need to learn, become the learning machine, just what Tai Lopez teach, and also Charlie Munger. Develop the habit of continuous learning. Munger speak in his book, getting little bit wiser bed every day. Step by step your get a head.. not necessary of fast spurts.. Also Heidi Grant-Halvorson speak this in her book 9 things what successful people do different.. if I remember correctly name of her book, I highly recommend her writings, read them all. She use a term getting better every day. I give here to think my wisdom what I read in the tantra books.. the pleasure is what you collect when having sex, not chasing orgasm, they are only side things, they would come or not to come, your only goal of sex is concentrate on getting pleasure, collecting it in very big balloon, what grow up but not popup.. pleasure is the secret of good sex. Frankl also spoke this in his book. Also Tai Lopez. Not in what I said but you not happiness neither money if you focus to chasing it. So just what I said do not chase orgasm, like Lopez do not chase money. Frankl also spoke sex also, chasing orgasm is kind a hyperfocus which causes neurosis. You will lost it, if you chase. Tai Lopez used analogy of cat. You can’t chase cat. You need build circumstances for cat and then cat will come on your lap. Casanova use term being a flame not a moth. Women will come if you’re a flame.. or the right people too…

Sharing

I spoked with Rose-Pussy, and she said I need to learn to share. I share you my book wish list and I will also share my books which I were listed from my first website tuhero dot fun slash books. But wish list: Mankiw, the principles of economics; few lessons of investors and managers, by Warren Buffet, Peter Bevelin. and The Litttle Red Book of Selling by Gitomer.. and The Flow, very uneasy name who write that.. and Made in America, Sam Walton..

Sharing is caring… I reading now Jia Jing, Rejection Proof. 100 days of rejection. Very good book of persuation, just like Cialdini.. your need sell your self, persuade with people, make them say “yes” to you.

School

Playboy style school which where beautiful girls teaching you how to make money… This is not sexists but it’s kind a my world cos I love beautiful women who are slightly dominant.. or very dominant.. who are strong ladies who have abilities to go there where nobody was never been. Who are gorgeous, sexy, very intelligent and also dominant, making lot of money.. business women. Are you that kind woman?

Oh shit

The Rose-Pussy.. I take a risk and asked out. She told where she live. I can escape or go through the hell. I get pussy. I think I am crazy. She is so energetic and sexy. Doing hard work. I think I need escape. I have no clue what I am doing and won also my fears to taking risks to asking mentors.. Tai Lopez mobile.. I think I need focus to my main problem, the poverty. Doing hard work is not my thing, doing smart work would be, but I am also shitty situation..

The Rose-Pussy

We met those again at online. She is so sweet, I cried little bit tiers of joy.. she said she not take pussy rings etc.. I felt that she really does that for me. It melts my heart. And I am little bit confused about what goes on in my head and my heart. She’s polyamorous and I think I am too. I was sad with my ex-wife that my sexual experience was too tiny and focused only at her.. I think Rose-Pussy is something who burry my bs.. I am not a swan.. I am gentle, lovable and really can love many than just one. I loved my ex-wife and I was in her life. She brings her family in my life. And I have family and I was part of it. Now she left and I think because I am polyamorous. I can love many, not just one. Fuck with everybody.. my ex-wife show her life and I rewired my brain very messy to adapting her life in my life.. I am not fuckin mono. I loved my ex-wife and also feel I can like others too. I think it’s goes something like that. I love and I get love with one person and also I can feel little bit love, or rush to someone else. In law of attraction reviews that I attracted by similar what I am, so many people are poly, so I am too…